Easter Time! YEAH! Celebrate! The happy bunny!

It's Easter time. Everyone all happy?! YAE!!!! Its a beautiful weekend too! Thank you Lord for the beautiful weekend! See, its because we all know you did it for us! So we know we're even more loved then before!

Remember all that down time shit you were all going through? Rought times, maybe even still are? Hating life. Wishing you didn't have to even COPE with life? See? Its all better now! Cause its EASTER TIME!!!! Its another one of those holidays that come around where Christ does shit for us and makes all the goofy shit we did in the mean-time ok! I (wish I) LOVE(d) THIS RELIGION!!! You can do anything in it! If you're powerful enough (and everyone in it, IS), then you can even have shit changed OVER to make shit better for you! Dudes.... Christianity... Catholisism.... Come on... Its where its at. You all know it. They did this shit right! New, modern, better... Christianity. Where we're sorry we killed ya, and even more sorry we're gonna be ridin' to glory on the Lord God's ass right after we do it!!! Fuckin' A!!! I'm totally down with that. Just gotta remember to do all that shit in HIS name, and not, like , in the name of Shamee The Butcher down the road's name. You go doing that shit; you're gonna get Shamee in all sorts of shit himself.

Anyway, I'm side-tracking here. I'm busy celebrating Easter!

Bunnies and eggs and shit.

Remember, if you got a beef with an ass down the street that you wanna, oh,... kill... just be sure to think of him as a lamb (as you kill him of course) and ... I dunno... maybe eat some of his ass. It might make things go farther with the Father God dude in a long run. I figure his son would be down with it, saying shit like, "OHHH! DAD! DAMN!!! That dude is eatin' that guy's ass he just shot and calling him one of your lambs!!! OH! I GOTS to have me some of that power! That is just sick as shit Dad of the Almighty Dads!!!"

So this Easter.... I want you to remember what its all about. Lets keep it real:

Be thankful that you can get away and rationalize any shit you want and be fucking blessed for it.

Be thankful that you can smoke some stupid fuck that has it coming to him and still get your ass hauled up to have a seat next to the almighty (though I'm pretty sure you gotta wait in some kind of line siminlar to pickin' up free cheese-cakes they give out at a casino promotional).

Be thankful for all those fucked up, trippin rabbits shitting multi-colored eggs all over your fuckin yard! How often does that shit happen?

Now, you all go make nicey-nice with you families. Jesus Love You. (Just haven't figured out why yet, but I'm workin' on it.)

The Disaster At Mine Shaft 1

Just sing it any way you want like Johnny Cash.
It works.


The call rang out from Mine Shaft 1
“There’s trouble down below!”
“We better send a team in, Jim.”
The foreman cried, filled with dread and woe.

No one knew what the problem was
But headed under ground.
With pick and shovel and saws in tow
They tore up everything around!
No rhyme or reason did they think
But tore everything up around.


When you got trouble down below,
And don’t know where to turn
Keep ‘em steady and think things out
Lest this bunch make you burn.

Don’t let ‘em mine that deep, dark hole.
Don’t let ‘em underground.
Don’t let ‘em dig down low, Jim.
Send those boys back to town!
The men attacked ole Mine Shaft 1
Like there was no tomorrow.
Of what they were saving
They did not know
But with fervor they did burrow.

They hacked and dug and cut away
Everything in their path.
The sweat and tears and blood did flow
As they toiled through the day.
Hell was in their wrath, Jim.
Hell was their wrath!

When you got trouble down below,
And don’t know where to turn
Hold ‘em back and think things out
Lest this bunch make you burn.

Don’t let ‘em mine that deep, dark hole.
Don’t let ‘em underground.
Don’t let ‘em dig down low, Jim.
Send those boys back to town!
Have ‘em take them tools back with ‘em!


And a yell was heard from who knows where
As the boys worked in a frenzy.
The bossman screamed,
“You leave old Mine Shaft 1 alone!”
The call was heard a bit too late.
The boys had hacked down to the bone.

Poor Mine Shaft 1,
They did thoroughly destroy.
No soul to save
No family’s grave.
A major mistake had been made.
Was a mere mistake that was made that day
By a toiled worker who thought he’d say
Something to make a better way
To ease the burden on Mine Shaft 1
But an error now; miscommunication made.
There was no danger
No one was trapped.
But poor Mine Shaft 1
Was now mutilated and scrapped.

The men retreated
Came out of the hole
Dragging their bodies and saws and hoes.
They did their best
To seal the rest
Of poor ole Mine Shaft 1.

Now an unusable meandering mess.
The company men are out of work
For Mine Shaft 1 they’ll be no redress.
The damage had been done, Jim.
The damage had been done.

When you got trouble down below,
And don’t know where to turn
Hold ‘em back and think things out
Lest this bunch make you burn, Jim.
They’ll fuck you in the end, Jim.
They’ll hack your hole to hell, JIM!
They’ll hack it all to hell.

Don’t let ‘em mine that deep, dark hole.
Don’t let ‘em underground.
Don’t let ‘em dig down low, Jim.
Send those boys back to town!
Get them the fuck away from the hole, Jim!
Send ‘em back to town!

The hole’s been fine for years before.
And would have been 50 more.
Poor Mine Shaft 1’s all empty in ruin.
The boys did a number on it
That’s for sure.

The seal they constructed on that day
Never held back shit.
Screams continue to this day
To echo from the deep, dark ways.
From underground, from who knows where.
They never should have fucked
With Mine Shaft 1,
And were haunted evermore, Jim.
Haunted evermore.

So when you got trouble down below,
And don’t know where to turn
Keep ‘em steady and think things out
Lest this bunch make you burn, Jim.
They’ll ruin you and you will burn.

Don’t let ‘em mine that deep, dark hole.
Don’t let ‘em underground.
Don’t let ‘em dig down low, Jim.
Send those boys back to town!
No need to mine that deep, dark hole.
Don’t let ‘em underground.
Don’t let ‘em so far below.
Don’t let ‘em hack n’ slash their way.
Mine Shaft 1 has ended its day.
This bunch made us burn, Jim.
This bunch made us burn.

Atlantic City Local Entertainment

Some of the local entertainment on the boardwalk.

AC approach on Rt. 40

I dunno... This is a fucked up video I took of whats left of the old motels that were the shit back in the day on Rt. 40 as you enter Atlantic City. The song, though sort of hard to hear, just makes this work hilariously.

Just another thing to go to hell over.

Dee Pest Revisited

I went outside today.
Had to dig through feet of snow
And feet of ice.
I cursed and spit
With the thought of it.
Its been there for days
And still falling now.
I noticed the snow
Has been covering cows!

We’re not here for snow.
We’re not here for grief.
We’re not here to discuss
The shoveling off of beef.
Though I often dream of
Why cows are subjected
To their own snow accumulation.

The animal I speak of
Is hallowed and worshiped.
He makes a meal
Into a magical feast!
Its Dee Pest I speak of!
The ultimate beast!

While I dug through the snow
I noticed a path.
Never observed before
I had to laugh.
It looked so inviting
Familiar too.
I heard the singing
So soft and clear
That I knew in my heart
Dee Pest was near!

As I neared the road
The temperature rose.
My coat came off.
I blew my nose.
Foliage became green
I could smell deep grass and
The dusty vanilla of fern.
When Dee Pest calls
Your heart will yearn.

Dee Pest, Dee Pest
That Quality Pork.
Feed you right,
Make you york.
Calling softly
Ignore the cold
Its always perfect
At the home that’s Dee.
If you had a lick of sense
You’d come with me.

The house was there
With steaming vats n’
Feral cats
That kill the rats
By friendly bats
With nary a gnat
How ‘bout that?!
But those cats won’t piss
Or make a fuss.
They smell like flowers
And lick your cuts.
You’ll heal forever
At the home that’s Dee.
You’ll feast like
The most honorable royalty!

I walked inside
The kettle was on.
Steaming stews n’ brews
Intoxicating the senses
Blowing the mind.
The root cellar called
I took a peek.
Heaps of taters n’ veggies
There’s anything you seek.
I returned to the fire
To worship the feast
I knew shortly
I’d be eatin’ the beast.
The beast that’s great
Ain’t no fake.
The quality pork
Pulls apart with a fork.
He cooks himself daily
Over and over again.
Feeding believers and sinners
Suffering and sickening
Killers and blessers
The harmful and meek
All you fuckers line up
For a taste of his meat!

So if you’re out on the road
And see the path
Don’t question, just follow.
You do the math.
Come find Dee Pest
The Quality Pork
Stuff your face,
Then your ass with a cork.
Dee Pest, Dee Pest
He’ll make you full.
Refill your soul with
That quality pork.
The pots always on
The pork’s always ready.
Come and find Dee Pest
Try his combo medley!

Partying In The Snow At Hell House! Part 3

Well, frankly people. There isn't anything else going ON except for fucking snow at Hell House! So look at these charming fucking pictures and shut up!