Smells Like Da' Coqui

A blog outta nowhere…

In doing some general research for a trip I will soon be embarking on, and because such things concern me, I ended up researching what Puerto Rico smells like.

Thanks to our World Wide Web I have now determined that coquis smell like Pabst Blue Ribbon beer. So I’m now looking forward to, beyond seeing and hearing these little things, smelling them.

One may ask, “Wow! How did you come to research the smell of the coqui, Darkgarden?”
It all started one day a long… no… not long, as time is relative to me. It all started one day in the past when I started thinking about Puerto Rico being a possible new home for me. The allure of the endless lack of cold is a pleasing thing for one of my nature.

Though I grieve deeply for America, I do dislike the idea of turning my back on it as well. I don’t believe there is any revolutionary hope for it, and I feel as I type that it is dying; the America as we know and love it. I have served it civilly and as such feel that I know a deeper pulse that it carries beyond the majority. This led to a dilemma. In so serving, I also feel attached, and don’t fancy the aspect of severing that tie. The idea of investigating Puerto Rico became relevant when one researches the cost of everything in the keys of south Florida. With Puerto Rico receiving the percentage based highest amount of government benefits, I figure they probably don’t hate us too much either. This has strayed a bit from the topic at hand, but some background never hurts a blog that no one (ok…hardly anyone) reads anyway, and serves as an outlet of thought and reflection.

So we come back to the wee coqui.

I think the Smell-O-Da-Coqui has gained its fame more from the likes of Smell-O-Da-Puerto-Rican.

Of course anyone from Puerto Rico at this point, probably wouldn’t welcome me with open arms. I admit, the concern that I have most about Puerto Rico is how everyone smells.
I hear the generic tales of Europeans being a slight more lack in hygiene than we are used to here in America (the more civilized parts). I am thus hoping that, perhaps in Puerto Rico, people received their cleanliness from … umm… those in habitation nearer to high populated towns or cities in mainland America.

I admit I have more than once ejected someone from my office who arrived there for a prearranged meeting, only do be stinking like things I dread in my thoughts on olfactory experiences. (I mean.. COME ON!... You people die and lay and gather stink that an everyday person could not vaguely imagine! This is all well and good, but someone has to remove you after the fact, and in this area, I seem to have a knack of ending up with you. I can always forgive this accompanied by the feeling of pity and dread, but when you’re alive and you present yourself to someone else in public smelling the foulest of fouls, don’t fucking act surprised when someone eventually tells you, “Dude, look. You smell terrible. Why would you think of presenting yourself in such a manner? I’d be happy to meet with you when you return clean.”) Therefore my concerns about an overall public smell seem relevant… and shall remain so.

I have been constantly bombarded by people telling me that I would never move to such a location. This, of course, only serves to make me hope like hell that the place smells ok, as I’ve lost count of how many people I would so dearly love shove my dick in their ass upon my departure. I’ve unfortunately recognized so many, that it would bring tears to your eyes if you allowed the emotion to take the steering wheel for a short time. …and yeah yeah… You have those types everywhere. Fuck! The majority of the population consists of those types! However, the good ones out there always overpower the assholes (smelly or not), and for that reason I, for one, continue to fight the good fight.

Lets just say, I want a change of ass-holes. I’ve exhausted the ones around here.

...and I do wonder how the coqui smells at twilight.